I miss you
by Sweetylove30
Summary: My take on what could happen at the end of 6x08. Just a short one shot about what life could be for him and Lisbon after two years appart. Rating T for sexual content but not to graphic.


**A/N****: hi guys. I know it was done a lot over the last two weeks, but I wanted to write something about the end of Red John. I know that the episode is already on internet, but I did not watch it. I prefer to wait, so I don't know how it will end. I hope you will like this small piece of text.**

_Sweety_

* * *

**I miss you**

* * *

On this cold night of December, Teresa Lisbon walked along the river. With her hands in pockets, wind in her hair and her face reddened by the cold, but she did not care. Many things have changed in a short time. She did not know what to think. She needed to think and this was the only place she could do it. Since Las Vegas and Jane had left her for six months without telling her, she had returned to this spot when she needed to clear her mind.

It had been almost two years since Red John had died. So much had changed after that. The CBI no longer existed. The team no longer existed. And worst of all, Jane was no longer there. She had lived ten years with this man at her side. It was ten years of helping him and supporting him especially when he was not feeling well. However, this no longer existed and now she was alone.

**-o-o-o-o-**

Red John and Jane were in the same room. Each was equipped with a weapon. Lisbon came in the room as Jane was about to shoot his enemy. She did not need to say anything. Her mere presence was enough. Jane did not move or turn his head toward her. Red John saw an opportunity and took it by directing his gun at her. He wanted to break the stalemate by killing her and hurting Jane in the process. The game he thought was not over. He pulled the trigger even before anyone could do anything.

It was at this time that Jane finally reacted and killed the man who had broken his life. He had taken the life of the man most feared in California with a bullet to the heart. Jane looked down dispassionately as his blood spread on the floor around him. The terror that Red John had imposed during all these years was finally over. Lisbon sat on the ground and clutched her arm. The wound did not look that bad as she stared at not the deceased but Jane. She waited for him to react or say something.

When Jane finally broke out of the trace, he walked over to her. He knelt beside her then took her hand to see the extent of the injury. A sigh of relief passed his lips after seeing the extent of the wound. He looked up to her and put a hand on Lisbon's cheek.

- "I am fine Jane" she reassured him.

- "Not so…You're hurt Lisbon" he said. "We need to get you medical attention."

He removed his jacket then pressed the fabric against the arm of the officer who winced a bit. She watched him without a word while waiting for his next move that did not take long to happen. He helped her up and they walked to Lisbon's car. He helped her to settle and then sat on the driver seat. He drove toward to the ER. He knew they would have to report it but the wound was serious.

Getting to the ER Patrick paced as she was taken to see a doctor. The doctor examined the graze. It was not too bad however Patrick's coat was covered in her blood. The wound was cleaned and a few stitches were required plus Lisbon received a tetanus shot for her troubles. Lisbon only reported that she was a victim of a stray bullet and nothing more. The doctor dutifully wrote it down in the chart.

Being a police officer she knew the proper procedure. SacPD would follow up if they got a chance. The doctor brought out the forms to sign. Lisbon did not know if her medical insurance was still in effect since the CBI was unlawfully disbanded. The FBI did not have the power to disband a State agency only to suspend their duties. Only the legislature could remove the CBI completely. As of this time they certainly had not agreed to do so. So Lisbon was quite certain her healthcare was still in effect. Of course she could always contact her union rep to see the legalities if she wanted. Though all Lisbon wanted was to get out of there with the least amount of fuss.

Patrick was relived to see her walk out of the ER under her own power. Lisbon saw Jane.

- "Patrick let's go home but first stop at the pharmacy for the pain pills and antibiotics." She said walking with her arm in a sling next to the Mentalist. "I'm so sorry about the coat."

- "Lisbon I'm happy that was the only thing I had to donate" He said with a smile.

Patrick did as she asked then soon they were at her apt. He helped her out of the car and escorted her to the door. Although, she was perfectly capable to do it by herself, it seemed important for him to do so she let him. He opened then closed the door behind them. Once inside he helped her to the couch. He left her there while he went into the kitchen. Only then did he let go. He put both hands flat against the kitchen counter and looked down.

He had always thought that the day he finally accomplish his revenge, he would feel happy and free. This was not the case. He felt a new wave of guilt invade his heart. He had always wanted to keep Lisbon away from it all, but she involved herself anyway. And now she was sitting on her couch with a wounded arm. How did he let such a thing happen?

He felt a hand on his shoulder and he turned to see Lisbon smiling at him. She stood with her arm in a sling. He had stayed in the kitchen longer than he thought.

- "I thought you came in here to get me my water to take these pills." She said then noticed the Mentalist's state. "Are you okay, Patrick?"

- "I'm sorry, Lisbon. I got lost in my thoughts here you go." He said as he got down a glass and filled it with water.

Handing the glass to her she took a few good gulps after she swallowed the pills the returned the glass to him which he placed in the sink. She wrapped her good hand around his bicep then gazed at him. He noticed and turned to look at her.

- "I did not want for you to be there, Lisbon. I wanted to protect you." He said.

- "It was not your fault Jane," she repeated. "I made my decision. The one to blame is Red John. He was the one who shot me no one else. You should not feel guilt over that."

Lisbon stared at his eyes. The guilt was still there and she knew it would take time before it disappeared completely. Though, Lisbon doubted it would never be far from the Mentalist's mind.

- "He's dead" Jane whispered trying to confirm what the facts were.

- "Yes, Red John is dead" confirmed Lisbon. "Jane you'll have to leave. My seeking medical attention will pop up on someone's radar. Plus my blood at the scene it will be traced back to me. You can not be here for that. I won't let you go to jail for a second time over Red John."

Jane looked at Lisbon with surprise. The tone in her voice made his heart ache. She was wounded once more and nothing he could say or do will ease this pain Lisbon moved away from him. She knew that it was her duty to stop and take him to court. But at the moment she had no duty. The CBI was no more thus that ended her duty. She looked at him and knew in her heart she would not turn him in. She could not bear it. She loved Jane more than anything and even if he had killed the man he did it protecting her. She could not bear the idea of losing him. She preferred to think him being alive and safe living far away from her than being sentenced to die.

- "You must go" she whispered one last time before leaving the kitchen and going up to her room to lie down.

It had been an exhausting day. She believed it will become much worse when SacPD or the FBI came to question her.

Before she left she turn to look at Jane once more. He looked at her with her shoulders shaking with sobs. She was crying and it was his fault. How could he could do that to her? Lisbon exited to go to her room. Jane watched her leave. He listened and heard the noise upstairs. That informed him that she was in the bathroom. She gave him a chance to get out and to leave before it is too late. But he could not leave her knowing his last memory would be of her crying. He decided he had to see her again. So he climbed the stairs, knocked and entered.

Lisbon came out of the bathroom and saw Jane entering the room. Why was he still here? Why did he not leave when she left him alone in the kitchen? He had to flee as soon as possible even if this idea made her heart ache. She was about to tell him what she thought. That is when he came up then grabbed her face and slammed his lips on hers.

Her first reaction was surprise then Lisbon finally wrapped her good arm around his neck and kissed him back. Her other arm ached but that did not matter. She finally had what she had wanted for so long. Jane was kissing her and it was not a dream. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against hers.

- "I'm sorry Lisbon," he whispered against her lips. "But I could not leave before thanking you."

He kissed her again and Lisbon melted in his arms.

- "I promise I will return once this is all over." He said.

He turned to leave but Lisbon caught him by the arm and dragged him with her to the bed where they sat. Lisbon held his hand refusing to let it go. She knew she would regret what she was about to do. She dropped Jane's hand and began to unbutton his shirt. Jane let her to her surprise. Lisbon did not dare look up at Jane. She was unable to meet his gaze.

The woman pulled her shirt over her head while still not looking at Jane. She then stood up, open the fly of her pants and slid it down her legs. She stood clad in only her underwear before Jane for the first time. Previously inactive, Jane stood up and approached her. He put a finger under her chin and lifted her face to meet his eyes.

- "We should not do this, Lisbon" he said softly. "Even if I want to we mustn't."

- "You got what you wanted, Patrick. Let me get what I want." She sternly said.

- "Lisbon…The separation will be more difficult this way." He implored.

- "Yeah…Whatever, Patrick" she said.

Even though he knew it was a mistake, Jane slid his hand on Lisbon's good arm making her shiver. He mingled his fingers with those of hers and pulled her down. They lay on their sides gazing into each other eyes.

- "You'll regret it, Teresa" Jane whispered.

- "I already regret it" she confessed. "However, before you leave I want to have what we never could have before."

Jane could not answer to that. He went to Lisbon and kissed her lovingly. He had dreamed of this for years too. Even though, it was not the best time. Though, it was the only one they had. He rolled Lisbon on her back and stood over her, enjoying the softness of her skin beneath his. He slid his hands on her arms, shoulders and down to her belly. Lisbon stroked his back. He continued with his strokes down to her buttocks. She needed more, to feel him against her. She ran her fingers through his pants and slid it down his legs. He helped her by pushing the garment with his feet. He straightened without ever leaving her lips. Jane took the opportunity to unhook her bra and tossed it away. He slammed against her and groaned with pleasure as he felt the softness of her breasts against his chest.

- "I love you, Patrick" she confessed against his lips.

She felt relieved of a burden that had stayed hidden for way too long. She had wanted to tell him these words for so long. It felt good to be completely honest for once.

Before Jane could answer, she swung and placed herself on him. She smiled when she saw his eyes became dark with desire. Jane ran his hands over every inch of her body and groaned when he passed on the fabric of her panties. She got the message and stood up. Jane leaned on one arm to look at her removing the last garment between them. She came to him and grabbed the hand he held out.

Lisbon lay on her back with a beaming smile on her face. Jane returned to her with the same smile. Despite the situation they were in, they were happy. They had their last moments together and they wanted to enjoy it. The separation will come soon enough.

- "Make love to me Patrick" Lisbon murmured.

And that's exactly what he did. He loved Lisbon all night with much tenderness. Tears slid down her cheeks from both joy and sadness. She knew it would be the only time she could share an intimate moment with the man she loved. She hoped that she would see him again. Then she doubted it would ever happen. It did not matter at this moment. That was in the future and only the present mattered.

The couple went to sleep early in the morning in the arms of each other. But when Lisbon awoke to the pain in her arm she was alone in her bed. Jane had left. She swallowed her sobs. She knew it was for the best. It did not make this separation any easier.

After several minutes she wrapped herself in a robe then got up and went to the kitchen. It was still early and soon the FBI or SacPD or both would come to inform her of Red John death. They would ask her where was Jane. She would not say anything about him only her own involvement. She could not bring herself to lose the man she loved. Even though, she may never see him again.

Arriving in the kitchen, she found an empty cup with a note and an origami turtle. She smiled while taking the note.

_"Teresa,_

_I 'm sorry I did not wake you. It was for the best. If I had awoken you, I would not have been able to leave. I do not know when we would see each other again, or even if we would. I hope one day more than anything that we will._

_Please take care of yourself Teresa and do not wait for me. Live your life, be happy._

_I love you forever Teresa,_

_Patrick "_

**-o-o-o-o-**

And now, two years later, she was still waiting. She knew that was not what he wanted for her. She could not bring herself to live with someone other than him. She had never loved a man as she loved Patrick Jane.

Then she walked through the night trying to forget his absence. It was not easy. Tears constantly formed reminding her of how much she missed him. What could she do? She loved this man with all her heart. Even all the trouble that he had imposed had not changed that at all. He was imprinted on her heart.

Lisbon shivered then decided it was time to go home. She was tired and needed sleep. Her last case had been hard. She had given herself fully to resolve it. She had done it. Now, she was waiting for one thing: some quiet time. After her walk, she planned to take a long bath with a glass of wine before slipping under the covers of her bed.

Christmas was fast approaching. She wanted Jane to be there for the holidays. It would be the greatest gift he could give her: coming back to her. She knew that she was no longer a child. She also knew she certainly would not get what she dreamed about the most. She had hoped last year and spent the evening looking at old photos of her team including him. It would not be the same this year.

She was not that kind of woman who would wait for the man she loved to finally come back and decide to stay with her. Of course, she always kept a little hope. How could she not? She had spent ten years at his side. She was there to help him in his quest for revenge. She had never agreed with him. Though, she had still helped him just the same. What was it all for in the end? …Nothing. That was the answer. He was gone and she was left with nothing but the glorious memory of one night. She knew she could not blame him for leaving. She had forced him to go. However, He was correct it did make living without him extremely hard. After that night nothing was the same.

Lisbon walked to her apartment with her hands still in her pockets. The cold had intensified and a light rain began to fall. She opened the door and entered. Her keen eye spotted an envelope on the floor. She was surprised to see it laying there. She bent over to pick it up. She closed the door behind her before she took off her coat, dropped her handbag and removed her shoes. She prepared herself a coffee. Once properly fortified she sat on the couch with the envelope in her hands.

She turned the envelope over to search for an address. She wanted to know who sent it. There was none. No name, no return address, nothing to tell her who wrote this letter. The only thing was her name on the front of the envelope. She knew the handwriting. She recognized immediately the smooth writing of Patrick Jane and her heart jumped in her chest.

She opened the envelope with trembling hands and her heart pounding. A photo fell out. She picked it up. It was of him, Jane. He smiled that smile she loved so much with his eyes shining with happiness. The picture showed that he was in an apartment somewhere. She lost her smile for a moment then quickly recovered. Jane seemed happy at least he looked so in the photo. That was all she ever wanted for him whether he was with her or not. He finally had found what he needed a place where he was well. She could not blame him.

Her vision blurred with tears that she refused to let flow. There was an accompanied letter which she grabbed and unfolded. She began to read.

_"Dear Teresa,_

_I'm sorry to have kept you waiting so long to write to you. I wanted to do it dozens of times, but I was afraid to hurt you while doing so._

_It's nearly Christmas, a holiday that you like very much. And I know that you will spend alone. You could go spend it your brothers and enjoy your family. However, I know you will not do it just like last year. It is needless to roll your eyes because you know I know you well._

_I attach a photo to my letter. As you can see, I found a place I like. It is a place where I feel good. It took me so long to find where I would feel well in my place. Now, I've found it._

_I promise you that I would soon be there with you. Then you can tell me everything. Even though, we both know I had to leave, it did hurt you and that I'm totally sorry had to happen to you my best friend._

_I miss you Teresa, more than anything. I keep in my heart the memory of our night together. This memory is the only thing that kept me going these two years. That and the words you whispered to me._

_You don't know how I would have wanted to tell you too, but I would not have had the strength to leave you if I did._

_I promise that we'll be together soon._

_Much love, Patrick."_

Lisbon finally let her tears flow down her cheeks. She was torn between grief and joy. Jane had told her that they would be soon together. She was not sure that is a good idea. He still risked prison for killing a man and she did not want him to take the risk just for her.

Lisbon placed the letter into the envelope, but kept the picture out. She gazed it for a moment. His face, his smile and his eyes had not changed much. There may be a few more wrinkles though. She took a look in the mirror it looked like she had aged ten years at once.

She lifted the photo to her lips to lay a soft kiss. She would never forget her love for him. Also she would love him forever. She had spent years in love with him and she would never forget it.

She finally got up and went to bed. She had a free weekend and must use it to clean her apartment. Maybe she would decorate a little. Even though, she would have no one to celebrate this Christmas. She had always loved this time of the year. Jane was right on this point. And he was also right about the fact that she would not go see her brothers again this year. They had their lives and their families. Though, she was their family too. She just felt not attached to them anymore. She envied them so much for being with the ones they loved the most. She was even jealous. She did not think she would ever be any good company until he returned.

Her decision was made. She would stay at home, alone, as always. Maybe she would order something to eat while watching old Christmas movies. Or maybe she would ask Mrs. Schwartz if she wanted to share a meal with her. Lisbon knew that the old lady had no family. If she would not see hers, she could at least offer some company this old woman would be nice. And she hoped that like she would do for Mrs. Schwartz, someone would kindly do the same for her.

Lisbon put the picture on her bedside table, against the lamp. Thus, she could see it every time she opened her eyes in the morning. Of course she already had pictures of him. Most of those were taken by Van Pelt. Those were alright but this one was even more important. This photo was made just for her. It was the most recent she had of him. In this photo, he was happy. His smile was real and eyes were shining. She loved this photo.

She stared at it for a moment before finally getting to the bathroom to wash up and change. She returned a few minutes later wearing her favorite long t-shirt and slipped under the covers. Her eyes rested on the photo of Jane one last time. She really hoped she would see him soon as he had told her in his letter. She then closed her eyes and fell asleep.

**- oooo -**

Jane lay awake in bed. He had suffered from insomnia for years. He was used to it. However, he was tired and wished of one thing: sleep. Every time he closed his eyes. He saw her emerald eyes and her ebony hair framing her beautiful face with freckles. This woman had haunted his nights for so long and even more since he had left.

Jane often regretted having left like that. He did it without even saying goodbye to Lisbon. She had risked her job for him. She had never blamed him. She had never complained whenever he had lied to her or when he had broken her heart even more. He regretted everything that transpired but he could not change the past.

He had spent two years away far from Lisbon. It had not been easy. He had tried to make a new life and meet people. But each time he managed to find a little joy in his life, he thought back to Lisbon and he lost his smile. Until one day a person came to see him to say that he could return home.

He had trouble believing it at first. He was wanted for murder in his home. But he had learned that all charges were dropped and he was now a free man. Despite his joy in hearing that news, he had not really believed it until he had passed the airport security.

He had returned to the United States recently after two years of absence and had found an apartment. He had furnished it as simply as possible. He had not wanted to appear like the man he had been before. He was a simple man now and he lived simply.

He wanted to get closer to Lisbon and being in the same city was the best way. He saw her once in passing at a park. He did not expect to find here there. Lisbon never came to the park. At least that was the case before. Things had changed so much and she had changed too. She had let her hair grow. She wore a little more make-up. She was so much more beautiful without makeup. He quickly realized why she wore make-up. He had noticed the dark circles under her eyes. Jane was angry at himself he knew it was his fault.

But all of that was behind him now. He had a chance for a new life. He was a free man and he could do what he wanted. Almost completely free, the only reason for his return was to assist the FBI. They wanted him to help them. He was to join that agency as a consultant as he had done for years at the CBI.

He did not know if he could work with those who had always thought of him as Red John accomplice or worse, Red John himself. Now they wanted him to help them. Yet it was through the FBI he was back home. He had no choice. The only positive point was that he could finally see Teresa again. However, he did not know how to approach her. He knew that after two years. Things might not be the same. He feared she would reject him. Even though, his departure was her idea.

Still unable to sleep and despite that it was six o'clock in the morning. He got up and decided to go for a walk. He needed to calm his mind and at this time of morning, there would be no one to disturb him. He liked to walk in the morning. It was quiet and relaxing. He also liked to watch the few people who got up early.

He quickly dressed in jeans and a thick jacket. The winter was cold, especially this year. It seemed to reflect the state of his heart since he left Lisbon. He felt cold inside and he knew only one way to warm up. But he could not, at least not yet. It was too early, even if it killed him to wait.

He left his apartment and headed to the park. He loved to visit this park as it was there he had seen Lisbon the first time on the day he had returned. He had wanted to go to her, to take her in his arms and tell her again and again how sorry he was for what he had imposed her for two years. But he did not. He had not been ready that day. He was now. He just had to find the right time for it.

Jane finally arrived at the park and sat on the same bench as last time. It was a place secluded where he could watch people as much as he wanted without being seen. It was the perfect place to indulge in his favorite activity. There was a light morning breeze which ruffled his hair and he closed his eyes. For two years he had enjoyed the sun and the beach. Those were fine distractions. However, he preferred to be here enjoying the cold of winter especially if she was near.

Christmas would come soon and he had many things to do. For the first time in years, he wanted to decorate his apartment for the holidays. A Christmas tree with some garlands and perhaps even a nativity scene would be nice to grace his humble abode. Even though, he did not believe in it. He believed this would allow him to feel closer to her.

While taking advantage of the first rays of sun, a figure caught his attention a little further. It was a woman running alone on the way past him. He watched her until she was close enough for him to see her face. He then froze recognizing her. A few yards away stood Teresa Lisbon. She had not seen him. He was about to get up to go to greet her. She disappeared from view by taking a small path on the right. He was sorely disappointed that he chanced upon her like that but took no action.

He seeing her in all her glory, left him with a pounding heart and hands that were sweaty and shaking. He knew that sooner or later he would see her in this park. He had no idea it would be today. But he had seen her and he realized he could no longer wait. Teresa was so important to him and he missed her so much.

Jane got up and ran as fast as possible to Lisbon's apartment. He arrived quickly and stopped at the door. He hesitated. He did not know if she was back yet from her run. He still did not know if she would let him in or not. He was braced and risked rejection because he could finally be with her. It was his last chance. He took a deep breath and knocked.

Lisbon was upstairs when she heard some one knocking on the door. She went downstairs to open the door unaware of who was on the other side. When she opened it and she saw who came to see her so early in the morning, she could barely believe it. Patrick Jane was in front of her. He was there after two years of absence. She had waited for this day to arrive and now it had. She had repeated in her mind what she would say or do. Now he was there and the only thing she was able to do was to squeal then throw her arms around his neck and kiss him.

Jane wrapped his arms around Lisbon's waist and pressed her against him. He returned her kiss with love and stroked her back. He felt his heart beating against his ribcage in unison with hers. He felt something wet against his face and realized she was crying. He pulled away slowly, rested his forehead against hers and stared into her glistening eyes.

- "I love you, Teresa. I always have and always will" he whispered.

Lisbon smiled and stroked his cheek. He had finally said it. These few words she had been waiting for so long. Nothing else mattered. The past, what they had done or said was over. What was most important was just being together. They would have time to talk later and to tell each other what they did during this absence.

Lisbon gently grabbed his hand and pulled him into the living room. They sat on the couch. She took Jane in her arms while reclining. She found herself on top of him then rested her head on his chest. She closed her eyes savoring the warmth of Jane's hand on her back and the softness of his lips against her forehead.

She would ask him later why he came back at this time. Now, he was back she fell asleep in his arms. Jane closed his eyes too. He was happier than he had ever been before. Soon, he fell asleep with his arms around Lisbon. It was the first time in a long time they both felt at peace.

* * *

**The End**

* * *

**A/N2****: please, tell me what you thought of it. I know there are better stories in there. I love review, it help me to know what you like or not and why. I hope you liked it and can't wait to here from you dear readers.**

_Sweety_


End file.
